Because I know lots of students and ex-students, I get reports from the field from non-profit folks. These kids go over their wanting to change the world, and end up just shaking their heads and thinking, "WTF?" This, I thought, was a pretty good one.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Saving the World
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Churchgoing
After a brief two year hiatus, I am back at church. Upon returning, I have realized that it is largely the same. This is kind of nice. Sex aside, religion is one of the few remaining ways we can get back in touch with something truly ancient and it’s nice to know, you know, that that is there.
Anyway, I’ve noticed that no matter what church I go to, there are many different people, but these two personalities seem to invariably emerge no matter where I go. I am sure you have met them:
The first is pensive. He laughs occasionally and when he is supposed to, but you can tell he just really doesn’t find anything all that funny. He probably leads a Bible study. He prays, worships, edifies, and as a whole, just looks very, very spiritual. Above all, however, he really enjoys quoting Bible verses. Unfortunately, they are rarely relevant to what is being discussed at hand and even if they are, they are only obliquely so and he always has to explain to you how, in fact, an obscure verse from Deuteronomy is actually related to whatever it was that you were saying. He is convinced he is called either to be a pastor or, depending on how popular he is, a missionary.
The second is a little different. He went to a fancy school and is probably a consultant, or, if he has a liberal arts degree, is Teaching for America. He learned a lot in undergrad and is convinced that the only questions worth discussing have no answers. He has recently discovered that the church is the only place in the world where he can be smart and a Christian at the same time, so he will passionately champion pro-choice/gay rights/midgets/etc. despite not really feeling any strong opinions whatsoever. He prides himself on being able to consider multiple sides of an issue, play devil’s advocate, and objectively entertain and consider diametrically opposed arguments, but let’s be honest, he was going to vote for Obama anyway.
Now, suppose God is a real, rational guy who just hates it when he sees his creation fumble with his gift of reason. Given that both these individuals claim his divine guidance, which one is more exasperating to witness go about his daily task of resolutely pounding square pegs through round holes?
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Learning to Surf
There are challenges.
For example, when you are catching a wave and you begin to paddle, you have a choice in your positioning with respect to the wave. If you are too far in front, the wave will break before it reaches you, and this is just bad news. The whitewater will make you unbalanced and in all likelihood, you will flip forward on your board and get caught under the wave. You have no control when you are under the wave. For most people, this is unpleasant.
On the other hand, if you are too far behind the wave, the wave simply glides under you. Despondently, you will watch, hapless on your board, as the wave continues, surging and breaking without you with no regard to your furious paddling. This is very sad and moreover, your fruitless paddling will make you look like amateur hour. And when you are starting out like me, you are very self-conscious about looking like amateur hour. It is one of the last things you want to be.
When I first started, I was a disaster. I wiped out, I drank a lot of seawater, and I grew frustrated. What I wanted was someone to correct me, to point out my mistakes so I could fix them. But that is not the way this works. It is an exercise that simply needs to be done again and again and the learning is individual. And after some time, I realized that once I began to get it right, I also began to increasingly perceive the maneuvers I was executing to make it right. I began to become conscious of the elements of what made things right and what made things wrong. Now, it is by no means always pretty, but I am beginning to understand how moving down a wave is supposed to feel and how it is supposed to look.
And through this, I have realized the reason I enjoy this in the first place and that reason is that the whole practice requires you to intuit, then trust, the intentions and movements of a force much greater than yourself—and only when you do this correctly are you able to stand.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Do This At Least Once Before The Summer Ends
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Moving In
Thursday, June 17, 2010
The End
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Jesus
Today, we were acting out a scene where the Frank family is celebrating Hanukkah as best they can despite being cooped up in hiding. One of my students who blames most of his behavior issues on ADD--let's call him Peanut--was in the class during this time. Turns out, Hanukkah sparks all kinds of learning.
"Alright kids, so who knows what Hanukkah is?"
Peanut: "I think it's a holiday."
"Good! Do you know who celebrates Hanukkah?"
"I think, I think, yeah I know, the Chinese, it's the Chinese who celebrate Hanukkah!"
"Well, okay, maybe some do. But most of the people who celebrate Hanukkah are--"
At this point, I have this other student who pretty much yells out whatever happens to be in his mind at any given moment. And he does this loudly. Let's call him Kenny.
Kenny: "Blacks!"
Peanut: "No you're stupid. Blacks celebrate Kwanzaa."
"Don't call him stupid. So okay, actually, the people who celebrate Hanukkah are Jewish. Do we remember who's Jewish in this play?"
Peanut: "Now I know I'm in the special class. Mr. Chen, do you know how I know? He's in my class, and he's retarded, so I'm retarded too."
"No, no, you're both not retarded. Don't use that word. It's not acceptable. Now, can we please remember who in this play is Jewish?"
Peanut: "Anne Frank!"
Kenny: "Hanukkah!"
Me: "Okay, yes. The Franks are Jewish. Hanukkah is the holiday, not the people, okay Kenny? Very good. Now what are they doing right now?"
Peanut: "I think they're praying."
"Excellent, that's exactly what they're doing."
And this is where things got confusing. Peanut, as always, started it.
Peanut: "Are they praying to Jesus?"
"Well, not really. You see, Jews--"
"Mr. Chen, was Jesus black?"
"Well, not really. I wouldn't call him black. Jesus was Jewish. He was from--"
"How do you tell if someone's Jewish?"
"Well, you see, it's sometimes hard to tell. Though there are--"
"Oh, but I heard Jesus was dark-skinned. Jesus was dark-skinned, right?"
"I guess so. Probably. It's hard to know--"
And then, before I could explain, I was interrupted again with another question which, I suppose, if you think about it, is kind of related:
Peanut: "Jesus had dreads, didn't he?"
"I'm not positive, but probably not." Sadly, this was the best I could come up with.
Oddly enough, that was Peanut's last question. I would like to take that as a sign that my answers were so complete that there was no more learning left to be done, but that, as always, would be awfully presumptive.